Men v. Women

Our youngest son shared this little gem on the family text stream the other day.  It illustrates so perfectly how men are from Mars and women are from Venus.  Their brains work so differently, they truly might as well be from different planets!

Yes, while a woman is having deep thoughts about the meaning of life or whatever, along with any number of worries about her family or plans for that day and the rest of the week, a man might be simply thinking of the Red Sox or dinosaurs or maybe even nothing at all.  (My husband, from time to time, has answered "Nothin'" when during some quiet stretch I've asked, "Whatcha thinkin' about?"  And I just don't get how that can be!  Nothin'?  Really?) But sometimes, I really wish I could stop my brain from racing along at 100 miles per hour, flitting from one thought to the next until everything is a tangled mess in there.  It can be exhausting.  Sometimes I wish my brain functioned on a simpler level, like a man's.

And I'm not bad-mouthing men when I say that; in fact, it’s much the opposite.  I actually love the way they don't waste a whole lot of time looking for hidden meanings in words, for example.  I love the way they get over things so much more quickly than women seem to be able to do.  And that's the beauty of God's plan, I guess: that the two sexes should be equal but different, complementary, each in need of the strengths, gifts, and talents the other has to offer. When a man and a woman are joined for life in Holy Matrimony, and the two become one...well, there just isn't any union more perfect than that.

'Tis true, however, that in some ways, men always stay boys at heart (says this mother of all sons).  So no matter how old they get, there will still be lots of random thoughts about velociraptors.

I ❤️ My Boiz

This is kind of an addendum to yesterday’s post.  Just a quickie.

As my husband and I boarded the plane last night for the first flight of our two-leg trip out to Iowa, I looked at our Pearl family text stream one more time before putting my phone in airplane mode.  And there was this text shared by son #4:

He also said our band’s next album title was going to be “Don’t Step on a Crack.”  🤣

I ❤️ my boiz.  They make me LOL.

Happy Belated National Chocolate Cake Day!! And National Cake Day!! And Birthday!!

So I was catching up with my blogging friend Madeline over at A Dash of Snark this morning, and I realized that I had missed a national holiday without even knowing that it existed.  There is a holiday known as National Chocolate Cake Day!!  True story!  And I missed it!!

(Am I the only one who didn't know that this perfect excuse for baking one of the best treats a sweet tooth ever tasted even existed?  Did everyone else know about it and not tell me?  Were you keeping it from me because you wanted to help me finally start and stick to the "21-day fix" healthy eating program that is on my long list of grandiose and ambitious resolutions for 2017?)

Well, I Googled "National Chocolate Cake Day," and I found out that it was Friday, January 27, 2017.  That got me curious to know if there was also a National Cake Day for all kinds of cakes, so I Googled that (yes, that's how I spent my morning: Googling national cake holidays!); and it turns out this is a holiday as well--and it was last celebrated on Saturday, November 26, 2016.  Who knew?!  What's so sweet to me is that my dad's birthday is November 26; what's more, he died on November 25, 2016, one day shy of his 82nd birthday, which he really wanted to live to celebrate.

Well, I know now what I have to do: I'm going to bake a cake today in honor of Dad's birthday, and I'll start my "21-day fix" tomorrow.  (Yeah, that's it: tomorrow.)

So...what kind of cake to bake?  There are so many great choices!  My go-to, however, is always a golden cake (made with butter instead of oil), topped with homemade buttercream frosting.

And it just so happens that I have another great excuse, aside from Dad's birthday (and of course, the important national holiday that I missed), to bake such a cake.  In February, my husband and I are heading down to VA to celebrate the first birthday of our little granddaughter, Princesa.

And I was asked if I would be willing to make her a "smash cake" for the party, which will be a royal affair fit for a princess if I know her other grandmother (who could seriously start a party-planning business, she's that good at it).  My answer of course was, "Would I ever!"

So this is the kind of cake I'm going to try to make for Princesa's big day, using 6" round pans.

As soon as I can get out to the grocery store for baking supplies, I'm going to practice by making a prototype of this little beauty.  And then my husband and I are going to do some practice eating of the cake, I believe.  Just so we'll be up to speed for Princesa's birthday.

Yes, I want to "fix" my bad eating habits.  But life is too short...and I also believe that every now and then, I just need to

(P.S.--Perhaps I'll post a picture of my practice smash cake tomorrow...even if it's a "Pinterest fail"!)

He Loves "Lucy"

Well, I just updated from Windows 8 to Windows 10.  How do I like the change, you ask?

AAAAGGGHHH!!!  Nothing is right in my computer world anymore!

I can't figure out how to add pictures to my blog now, which is a bummer.  So until I make a visit to the Geek Squad and get things ironed out, I'm going to be using my Kindle Fire to write posts.  Should be interesting!

This will be short and sweet today, because typing on my Kindle...woof.  I'm just going to share a picture with you, from about a million years ago--when my better half and I were fresh-faced newlyweds with nary a line on our plastic faces.  I think it would have made a great addition to yesterday's post, about the time I bought a dress we couldn't afford and then kept it a secret from my husband.

Because I think it looks like he's doing the Ricky Ricardo routine here:

"LUUUCYYY!  You got some 'splainin' to do about that dress!"

[With a guilty face]  "Umm...but you were hanging out at that club, Ricky. Waaaaaah!"

On that note...have a great weekend!

For the Love of Books: National Library Week--and a Giveaway!

It's Tuesday, which is supposed to be set aside for meetings of the "Grace-filled Tuesdays" book club. There will be no meeting today; but we will talk books.  Oh yes we will.

You've probably guessed this about me already, but...I am a big fan of books.  The biggest.  This meme really speaks to me.

A non-reader might say that reading makes a person boring, but I beg to differ. (Please, I beg you, don't think I'm boring!)

 

Full disclosure: I've always got a stack of reading material on my nightstand--mostly novels, but every now and then a non-fiction title sneaks its way into the line-up.  This is what my "to read" pile looked like a few months ago here at my son's house in VA.

Part of the reason I shared this picture with you is that I wanted you to see that framed drawing of the Blessed Mother, lovingly rendered in pencil by a friend of my daughter-in-law Preciosa.  I'm so glad that this beautiful drawing lives in the guest room that my husband and I are using while we're here!   Such beauty cries out to be shared.

I have already read the top three books in that stack up there.  And a number of others, not pictured.  But I've finally just started the one on the bottom, Fulcrum, by my on-line pal Dan Flaherty (who, incidentally, interviewed my first and third sons and their wives about meeting on CatholicMatch.com and wrote articles about them for the Catholic Match website).

I've actually been wanting to read Dan's book for a long time now, but since it's a story about Irish-Catholics in America, I was afraid to read it while working on my own story about Irish immigrants, Erin's Ring, because I thought the subject matter might be too similar.  For instance, in my book there is a real neighborhood in Dover that was nicknamed "Dublin," and in Dan's there is fictional one in Boston called "Shamrock."  But actually, I don't like to read any other novels while writing one of my own.  (For me, reading and writing fiction simultaneously is kind of like trying to dribble and chew gum at the same time--and if you can do that, my hat's off to you.)  But listen to this enticing synopsis on the back cover of Fulcrum:

A fictional neighborhood of Shamrock in the historic city of Boston is the setting for this Irish-American drama. Set in the immediate postwar period, Fulcrum portrays the lives of six teenagers who see their traditional neighborhood changing and wrestle with a response that will be true to their roots and to their conscience.

The tale is set against the backdrop of a classic Red Sox-Yankees pennant race, an old-fashioned mayoral campaign and the passion of football in autumn, all intertwined with the powerful presence, teaching and piety of the Catholic Church.

Fulcrum is an epic blend of Field of Dreams, The Last Hurrah and The Bells of St. Mary all rolled up into one, and destined to be a classic of Irish Catholic fiction.

This book is obviously a must-read for a Hibernophile like me!  (Yes, I just learned a new word, and I could hardly wait to use it.)

Okay, we've established my love of books.  And mind you, I mean the kind made out of ink and paper--and stored at an establishment that I hope will not go the way of the dinosaurs, now that eBooks are so popular: the public library.

And that was my neat little segue into my next topic: National Library Week.

In honor of National Library Week, I'm going to give away one copy of each of my novels here at the blog.

Tuesday April 14 is "National Library Workers Day," and I thought that was a perfect reason to give away a copy of Erin's Ring--a book that features the public library and a kindly and helpful librarian who works there.  If you win, perhaps you could give it to a special librarian in your life as a gift (or then again, you could keep it and share it with your favorite reader, middle school-aged and up).

Thursday April 16 is "Celebrate Teen Literature Day," and I thought that was a perfect reason to give away a copy of Finding Grace--a book that I wrote with high school-aged readers in mind.  If you win, perhaps you could give it to your favorite teen as a gift (or your favorite adult, for that matter!).

To enter the giveaway: leave me a comment anytime between now and Saturday April 18.  In your comment, let me know which of the two titles you would prefer to win.  It's a short window of opportunity, so if you want to throw your name into the hat, don't shilly-shally!

I look forward to your comments, fellow bookworms!

Let's Talk about Steel Cut Oats (Not Kitchens!)

Before...

After...





Oh yeah, that's right...I'm all finished talking about my kitchen makeover, and I'm not going to bore you with details about that anymore.

So, moving on to other topics: yesterday I was in the grocery store, and I saw a food item that I just had to have...to store on my new Lazy Susan (in that new kitchen I'm not going to talk about anymore).  It was a can of steel cut Irish oatmeal, and I just couldn't resist it.

Not only are the oats in this nifty vintage-style can Irish (and I am in love with Ireland and its people and pretty much anything pertaining to that Isle of Emerald--as you know if you read Finding Grace and will find out if you read the book I have in the works right now, Erin's Ring), but they're steel cut.

Why is the steel cut part so noteworthy, you ask?  Is it because this is one of the latest and greatest health food choices being touted out there (I assume, anyway, as I did find this can of oats in the organic/crunchy section of the store)?  No.  Is it because my husband loves oatmeal like Fighting Irish fans love to sing the Notre Dame fight song?  He does--but no, that's not why.  Is it because of a certain YouTube video, which my sons, to a man, think is hilarious (and as fans of the Christian Bale Batman movies, my husband and I must admit that we think so, too)?  Um, YES.  So enjoy this short Batman spoof (while realizing that some of these College Humor YouTube bits can be a tad inappropriate, although this one is not), and make sure to listen carefully, so you don't miss the steel cut oats reference.  (You may have to suffer through a short ad before the video starts.)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SVW6SH2bjYQ

My five darling sons (if you're reading this), that was for you!

And speaking of the Irish (we WERE speaking of them, before we got sidetracked by steel cut things, like Batman and oats), the many Irish-Catholic immigrants who came to this New England town in the 1800's, to escape poverty and famine in their native land, would give their eye-teeth to have what I take for granted: a local Catholic church, where one can attend Mass any day of the week.  And that's where I'm headed now , to celebrate the Feast of the Assumption of the Blessed Virgin Mary.

Well, have a great weekend, everyone!  And as an Irishman might say, may your troubles be few...and may your oats be steel cut!

A Few Wee Tidbits...No Time for More

We're back from our trip out to South Bend, IN, where we celebrated junior parents weekend with our youngest son, his buddies, and their parents.  Now we've got some quick last-minute things to take care of before we get back on the road again--we're headed for Upstate NY tomorrow or the next day for the wedding of son #4.  There are rehearsal dinner menus to be printed, there's a cake to be decorated, and there's a tooth to be implanted--hooray!!  If you come here often, you know that I was discouraged to lose both back molars on one side of my upper jaw several months ago, and I had to wear a sort of Invisiline braces contraption with a faux tooth embedded in it to my #3 son's wedding in December.  Well, I didn't HAVE to wear it; but I chose to, because I found that I'm much too vain when it comes to having a full set of teeth.  I really like the idea of having a full set.  Full sets of teeth are my favorite.  It would probably have been a good mortification for me to go without that device, trying to smile as widely as possible to show off my unfortunate gap...but alas, I am no saint.  And I thought I was going to have to wear the device again for this wedding, and lisp my way through another major event in my sons' lives; but my dentist asked the people who are making my new crown (also known, at least right now, as my best friends) to put a rush on it, and they have it ready for me today.

Anyway, gang, I really don't have a lot of time to spend attending to my poor, semi-neglected blog.  If I allow myself to try to compose something of substance, it will be 2:00 in the afternoon, I'll still be in my bathrobe, and I will have missed my dentist appointment altogether.  I simply can't let that happen!

But I thought I'd share a few quick tidbits with you.  When I scrolled through my Facebook news feed this morning, I saw that someone had posted this.

I thought I was just the worst texter in the universe, but this reminded me that it's not my fault.  Curse you, auto-correct!  The funny thing is, though, that a couple of times I've typed the word "Cahtolic," and auto-correct is like, "WHAAAAT?  I can't think of a word that is even remotely CLOSE to that one.  No corrections, lady.  You're on your own."  Really, auto-correct?  Really?

Another recent Facebook news feed gem is this meme posted by my husband's youngest brother, the #8 sibling in a proudly Irish family.

OMGoodness gracious, this is the best!  You really gotta love the Irish!

Okay, I'm off now.  I've got places to go, things to do.  Because in FIVE DAYS, son #4 will be receiving the Sacrament of Holy Matrimony--which is mind-boggling, because it seems like only yesterday that he was receiving his very first sacrament.

By the way, we did not wait until he was almost a year old to baptize this boy--although it might look that way, judging by the above picture. When he was born he weighed 10 lbs., 12 and 1/2 oz., and he was 24" long (at least--that was the length of the measuring tape and they didn't even bother to straighten him out completely, so he was probably longer), and he could already hold his head up without support.  He looked about 2 months old from the get-go!

Okay, I really must go.  The cake has cooled, so it's time to go into Cake Boss mode and get that thing decorated. 

Have a great week everyone!

7QTF: Seven Posts from the Old Days

I'm joining Sheenazing blogger Jen Fulwiler (et. al.) for her awesome Friday link-up extravaganza, but I'm not writing anything new for this post.  I do love to write; as Jen explained in her 7QTF post today, some of us have "the charism of writing (a charism being a gift from God that fills you with energy when you use it)", and I like to think I have this.  Well I must have it, I guess, because since I started String of Pearls back in March of 2011, I've published over 900 posts.  But if 10 people stopped by to read any one of my posts back in the old days, it was a good day.  And all you could hear in my comment box was the sound of crickets.  But I didn't really care--I knew very little about the wider world of blogging back then, and I was doing my little daily writing exercises because...well, because I just had to.  These days, I get a lot more "hits" and comments each day than I ever could have dreamed of when I was a blissfully ignorant newbie blogger.  So I suppose I've come a long way, relatively speaking.

(My blog profile pic, which I haven't changed since I started this blog.  And it was old then--taken in 2007.
But it's my favorite picture of me with my favorite sons.)

As I said, I'm not writing anything new today.  Instead, I'm going to re-post some oldies but (I hope) goodies.  I was still working to find my blogging "voice" when I wrote these, but here are some of my favorite posts from 2011.

-1-

This one is from 6/17/11.  The first time around, it got 12 page views and zero comments, but it's dear to me anyway.  I give you "Random Thoughts about Adorable Things."

-2-

And here's a post that came right after that one, on 6/18/11.  It also got 12 page views (most likely the same 12 relatives!) and zero comments, but I think it's a good one because it's about my favorite person in the world.  It's short and sweet, and it's called "An Early Happy Birthday to My Husband."

-3-

As a mother to all sons, I have been surrounded by lots of testosterone for a long, long time (until recent years, when two daughters-in-law and three granddaughters came along and injected the Pearl family which a much-needed shot of sugar-and-spice-and-everything-nice).  The differences between the sexes has always fascinated me.  Ditto for anything old, antique, or vintage--especially old letters.  So this post from 8/13/11 (20 whole page views--a big day!--and zero comments) remains a favorite of mine: "Men Are from Mars, Women Like to Talk."

-4-

This one is dated 10/13/11; 8 page views, zero comments.  When I wrote it, I was still adjusting to being an empty-nester for the first time, because the youngest of my five sons had left a few months prior to begin his freshman year in college.  I was really "Missing My Baby Boy."

-5-

So, being the mother of all sons, I have learned a few things about the hairier sex.  On 10/15/11, I wrote this post on the topic, called "Boys Will Be Boys."  The first time around, it was read by 9, commented upon by zero.  But I like it because it's about my second oldest son, a wonderful high school teacher and football coach.

-6-

One thing I love to talk about on this blog is my three beloved granddaughters.  This post from 10/17/11 was only seen by 5 readers when I first posted it, and guess how many comments it received?  But if you want to see undeniable "Proof of Life" in the womb, you don't want to miss this one about the twins.

-7-

I couldn't decide which one of two favorite posts to use for Take #7; but then I decided to use both.  They're each short enough that they could be counted as half a post.  The first, originally published on 10/19/11, completely tickled my middle son.  He was one of the 12 who read it that day, and although my comment box was empty, he e-mailed me to give me a big thumb's up.  It's called "You Can't Judge a Book by Its Cover."

And as if that wasn't enough humor for you, check out my ridiculously outdated glasses in this post from 11/19/11, titled "Babies and Bad Fashion."  It got 10 hits back then (and you guessed it, zero comments)--now you can be the 11th person to read it!  It'll only take you a minute.

So that's what String of Pearls looked like back in 2011.  Three years later, I hope this blog isn't getting too tired-out and repetitive.  I mean, maybe this is the year I'll give it a new look; most of the blogs I read have updated their page designs since I've started following them.  But I have the same look going on that I did at the beginning (with a few do-dads and gizmos added onto the right side of the page).  Because I'm set in my ways and I resist change with every fiber of my being.  But we old folks can be like that!

Now off to Jen's with you, for offerings that were freshly written this very day for your reading pleasure.

Office Space

I'm not referring to the laugh-out-loud movie here--you know, the one that has a bit of a cult following among the younger generation.  (The one that I've only seen in the cleaned-up version on TV, and might not have enjoyed quite as much in all its R-rated naughtiness had I seen it at the theater when it first came out.)

 

 

Well, that was fun (or possibly confusing, if you haven't seen "Office Space"--although most of the bloggers/blog readers I know of are members of the "younger generation" of which I spoke above).  But it wasn't my intention to do a movie review or anything remotely like that today.  I really just wanted to show you how I turned some wasted space behind the couch in our family room into a mini-office for my husband.

For many years, he toiled away at the massive piles of bills and paperwork he must constantly deal with in our finished basement, where we have an office area equipped with filing cabinets, two desks arranged in an L-shape, a desktop computer, a printer, and just about anything a person might need to stay on task.  We also had a classroom set up down there on one side of the basement for the five years that we homeschooled our youngest son, and a TV that our boys used mostly for playing video games.   But as the years went on, and we converted the attached two-car garage just a few steps away from our kitchen into a comfy man cave/sports room with a giant flat-screen TV, my husband started doing less and less of his paperwork down there.  Instead, he worked at a laptop either on the coffee table in front of the couch in the family room or on the oversized ottoman in front of the couch in the man cave (since he could multi-task from either of these stations, and watch TV while slogging through those piles of paper).  I was okay with this set-up for quite a while, but then I just got sick and tired of always having to move the piles whenever the surface of his makeshift "desk" was needed for some other activity.  Plus, he acquired a new, relatively portable Apple desktop computer that he was carting to and fro, which wasn't ideal.

What we needed, I thought, was a small office on the main floor of the house.  That way my husband could be where the action was while he worked, instead of holed up in the "dungeon" for hours on end.  But where in the world could we put one?

It suddenly occurred to me that although I love our cozy family room, there has always been a large empty space behind the couch, because we've always kept it pulled up closer to the TV-watching area of the room.  This space has come in handy for displaying our oversized Nativity set (on a folding eight-foot-long table) at Christmastime, but otherwise serves no real purpose.  Perhaps I could turn that wasted space into an office space?  (I'm not on Pinterest; but for those of you who are, things are about to get very Pinteresting.  Maybe.)

The first thing I did was angle the couch, so that there would be a little more room behind it (and this turned out to be a win-win, because not only did it create more office space, but it gave anyone sitting on the couch a better view of the TV.   (The couch has always been the least favorite place to park oneself in this room, when we're watching a game or a movie, although it has proven to be quite useful for napping.)

The next thing I did was take a trip over to Home Goods to see if I could find a narrow table that would be the right height to use as a desk back there, and I did--for less than $80.  It's got a bottom tier, too, which is a handy place to keep the printer.

 

 

 

Isn't this the cutest little office you ever did see?

We ended up making a second trip to Home Goods to find another little table to give my husband more storage/filing space, and we found the perfect piece, again for less than $80 (boy, if you need something for your home--be it furniture, rugs, dishes, knickknacks, or what-have-you--this place always seems to have the goods).  See it on the left?  Is it not adorable?  And it's got a slot on one side for an "in box" and a slot on the other for an "out box," to hold all the paperwork that's been dealt with and is ready to take down to the basement and file.

I love that this secret little office is out of the way, and that from this angle you can hardly tell what's happening behind that red leather sofa.  And now the coffee table is free to hold plates, cups, books, and whatnot.

The best part about the new office space, though, is that here's the view of the TV from the work area.

Perfect-o!

Okay, perhaps I'm a little too proud of our new miniature office.  I'm sure Pinterest has about a million better ideas to offer, but I just love what we've done here.

Is there anything more satisfying than figuring out how to turn a chunk of wasted square footage in your home into a useful space, and spending less than $200 to get to get it done?   It only took us about 22 years to figure out how to do that in this room!  But necessity is the mother of invention.  Or so I've heard.



Smile, and the World Smiles with You!



I'm off to the dentist this morning, to start the process of having a temporary phony tooth made (one that I can wear to my son's December wedding, as the permanent implant will not be ready in time for that), because this is what I look like these days:

 (Only not nearly as pretty as the lovely Duchess, whose face, figure, hair, and wardrobe I would take in a New York minute.  And in my case, the gaping hole is on the top, not the bottom.  But otherwise, this is about right.)

Because my smile makes me so self-conscious, this is how I've been rolling lately:

And I really hope I don't end up like THIS!! 

So that's my big news for today: I have a dentist's appointment.  Aren't you glad you stopped by?

Oh, wait a minute, I do have something worthwhile to report after all!  My very soon-to-be newest daughter-in-law is celebrating her birthday today.  She has the most gorgeous smile, and I'd take her teeth in a New York minute!

Happy Birthday, sweet girl!  Keep on smilin' and showing off  those Pearl-y whites!  ;)







Open the Cabinets! (Redux)

Yesterday, I saw something funny (and deja-vu-ish) come across my Facebook news feed. One of my young married nieces had posted a picture of her kitchen, with almost every cabinet door in it opened wide.  She said her husband is incapable of closing them, thus making it look as if their apartment has always just been ransacked and robbed.

I had to chuckle.  And then I remembered this post from way back in the spring of 2011. This one's for you, M!  (I think your guy is just trying to tell you that he wants to party!)

************

Tuesday, April 5, 2011

Open the cabinets!

Don't you just love it when really great, memorable family moments happen out of thin air, when you're not even planning them? Moments that make you laugh, and then provide you with insider "you had to be there" quotes that forever become a part of your family's lexicon? This happened in our kitchen about 15 years ago, when my sons were still in grade school.

My husband has a thing about people leaving kitchen cabinet doors open. Even though he's not the most accident-prone person in our family, and he's usually not the one who ends up banging his head into them, it still drives him crazy.

He travels for days at a time for his job, and for some reason there was a stretch where every single time he came home he'd walk in the door and find a cabinet door left open. Finally, he'd had it. "Do you guys do this on purpose or something? What goes on around here when I'm not home?" he asked, a bit exasperated. Without missing a beat, our oldest boy sprang up from his chair and started flying around the kitchen, opening wide every door while shouting gleefully, "That's right, Dad! When you're not around, it's party time! We're all like: 'Woo hoo! Open the cabinets!'"

Everyone laughed so hard--especially my husband, the butt of the joke. And from then on, "Open the cabinets!" has been our family's little celebratory catch phrase for commenting on happy or exciting news.

There's nothing like family. Just thinking about mine makes me want to open the cabinets.

************

I hope your weekend is full of fun--and those kitchen cabinet doors are just flying open!

The Man Rules

Men are from Mars, and women...well, you know the rest.

The men v. women debate is one that has always interested me.  I've had a lot of opportunities to try to get into the psyche of the male creature, having been surrounded by nothing but men in my house until the oldest of our five sons got married in 2009 and subsequently gave us our first daughter and then three female grandchildren.

Back in 2011, I blogged about the differences between men and women in a post called "Men Are from Mars, Women Love to Talk."  (It's a mildly amusing post, if you haven't read it before and would like to click on the link and check it out.)

Another super hilarious commentary on the differences between the hairier sex and the fairer sex is the YouTube video sensation called "It's not about the nail."  (OMGoodness, watch it if you haven't yet!  Most couples will instantly see themselves in it!  Ladies, your husbands/boyfriends might even say something like, "I can't even laugh.  It's too raw, too true"--as my sister-in-law's husband proclaimed, tongue-in-cheek, when we watched it at the recent Pearl family reunion).

Men really are from Mars, though, aren't they?  They do not have that uncanny ability we gals have to read the minds of others.  They get confused when we skip around between topics without any hint of a segue; they are usually three topics behind and stop us with, "Wait a minute--how did we get on this subject?"   They can't keep up.  I like to say they are simple creatures (and I say this in a slightly envious way, mind you, not a derogatory way--because the complexity of my over-thinking female brain is not something I always love about being a girl).

Yes, we're different.  It's how God made us, and He did so on purpose.  Men and women are equal in value as human beings, with immortal souls, created in the image and likeness of God; but equal doesn't mean exactly alike.  We don't operate the same way, and that's something we can't or shouldn't try to change--and in fact (dare I say it?) it's something that should be celebrated a lot more than it is in our modern world, where it seems there are forces trying to wipe out the very differences between the sexes that make them so complementary, so necessary to one another's physical, emotional, psychological, and intellectual well-being.

I thought I'd share with you today a list that we have laminated and hanging on the side of the bar in our man cave/sports room.  Ladies, if you can laugh at yourselves, you're going to really enjoy these "Man Rules," written by some insightful anonymous Martian.  (Note that all are equal in importance, and therefore each rule is ranked rule #1.)  I posted a few of these rules in "Men Are from Mars, Women Love Shoes" a long time ago, but here is the list in its entirety.

At last a guy has taken the time to write this all down.  Finally, the guys' side of the story.  We always hear "THE RULES" from the female side.  Now, here are the rules from the male side. These are our rules!  Please note: these are all numbered "1."  ON PURPOSE.

1. Men are NOT mind readers.

1. Learn to work the toilet seat.  You're a big girl.  If it's up, put it down.  We need it up, you need it down.  You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.

1. Sunday sports--it's like the full moon or the changing of the tides.  Let it be.

1. Crying is blackmail.

1. Ask for what you want.  Let us be clear on this one: subtle hints do not work!  Strong hints do not work!  Obvious hints do not work!  Just say it!

1. Yes and no are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.

1. Come to us with a problem ONLY if you want help solving it.  That's what we do.  Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.

1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.  In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 days.

1. If you think you're fat, you probably are.  Don't ask us.

1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the OTHER ONE.

1. You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it done.  Not both.  If you already know best how to do it,  just do it yourself.

1. Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during commercials.

1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.

1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.  Peach, for example, is a fruit, not a color.  Pumpkin is also a fruit.  We have NO idea what mauve is.

1. If it itches, it WILL be scratched.  We do that.

1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," we will act like nothing's wrong.  We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.

1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, expect an answer you don't want to hear.

1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine...REALLY.

1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as baseball or motor sports.

1. You have enough clothes.

1. You have too many shoes.

1. I am in shape.  ROUND is a shape!

1. Thank you for reading this.  Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight; but did you know men really don't mind that?  It's like camping.

Well, that's all he wrote.  As my granddaughter Cutie Pie would say, "Be end."

Blogging Humor

I saw the funniest on-line cartoon about blogging the other day.  (Also the UN-funniest, because it's a pretty sad commentary on what Internet social media has done to redefine the term "friendship" and the way we interact with one another.)  Unfortunately, this cartoon was sort of covered over with all these blurbs about copyrights and such, so it didn't look good enough to copy here. But here's the gist: A little boy is looking up at his mom, holding a laptop under his arm and saying, "Bobby's outside with his laptop.  Can I go outside and blog with him?"

Hilarious?  Or pathetic?

I am a blogger.  I blog.  But I do realize that blogging is an activity that lends itself to joke-making--and if you're a blogger, you'd better have a sense of humor and some pretty tough skin.

(Watch out for them typos!  They'll kill you every time.)

Ummm....I'm considering quitting the blog world and getting a real life!  I probably won't, though, because I'm just enjoying the whole process too much these days, and I'm "meeting" the nicest women bloggers.  They write about topics that are near and dear to my heart, and they inspire me.  

If only we could meet face-to-face with our laptops...and blog together.   [Insert smiley face emoticon here.]

"7 Quick Takes Friday," Volume 17: National Donut Day Edition

Did you know that today (the first Friday in June) is National Donut Day?  If you don't believe me, click on this link and read all about it.

I've been a bit of a linkaholic lately, so I was just going to do a short and sweet little post about donuts, my very favorite food item in the world (after soft-serve vanilla ice cream, or perhaps it's a tie...but I digress) and skip the fun of linking up for 7QTF.  But then my husband suggested that it's June 7, and I need 7 Takes for this link-up, and that seems to be a sign that therefore I should try to come up with 7 things to write about donuts.

He might be onto something there, I thought. I said, "You know what?  You're a genius! And YOU should write a blog."

So in honor of this important annual national holiday (which I somehow didn't know existed until this year), here are 7 Quick Takes (brought to you via a nudge from my husband) about one of the most delectable food items ever invented, the donut.

--1--

Here's a picture of "What I Ate Sunday" (not to be confused with Fine Linen and Purple's weekly link-up called "What I Wore Sunday").  It's not from Krispy Kreme or Dunkin' Donuts; it's just a no-name donut from the bakery section of our local grocery store. Mmmmm....Heaven.

Last Sunday's after-Mass brunch also included eggs, bacon, and a generously buttered English muffin.  If I eat like that every Sunday, I may be in trouble.

--2-- 

Speaking of Krispy Kreme, if you have branch near you (which we unfortunately do not), you might want to check out their National Doughnut Day giveaway.  It's SWEET!

--3--

Just in case you didn't bother to click on the link in #2...

Sorry for being repetitive.  But I really, really want to make sure you don't miss out on this golden opportunity.

--4--

Our family's two favorite comedians are Jim Gaffigan and Brian Regan, both of whom have some LOL-funny routines about different foods.  Regan has this hilarious sketch called "Donut Lady," which I was hoping to post here for your viewing pleasure--but I'm having technical difficulties.  If you go to YouTube and check it out, though, I guarantee you won't be disappointed.

--5--

This blog is not sponsored by either Krispy Kreme or Brian Regan.  I'm just doing some public service announcements.  Just giving credit where credit is due, out of the goodness of my heart.  (If the people at Krispy Kreme wanted to send me a lifetime supply of doughnuts as a way of thanking me, though, I would not decline the offer.  That goes for free tickets to a Brian Regan show as well.)

--6--

I'm a real history junkie (as well as donut junkie), so I was actually fascinated to learn that National Donut Day was created to honor the Salvation Army women who served donuts to soldiers during WWI.  (But then, you probably know that already--if you clicked on the helpful link I gave you way up at the top of the page.)

Here's some further history about the donut that might interest you--including the reason it has a hole in it, and why it's actually sort of patriotic to celebrate National Donut Day.

--7--

One last thing about my favorite (or possibly second favorite) food item on earth: when did the spelling change from "doughnut" to "donut"?  Are those pastries of the Dunkin' variety to blame for this widespread acceptance of the shortened spelling of the word?  I truly don't know which way to spell it anymore.

Well that's about all I've got to say about the rock star of the breakfast table, the donut (a.k.a. the artist formerly known as the doughnut).  So grab your coffee cup--and if you're lucky, your free Krispy Kreme doughnut (note that KK still spells it old-school style)--and head on over to Jen's for more 7's on the 7th. 

For more Quick Takes, visit Conversion Diary!