Falling Behind and Playing Catch-Up, as Usual!

When it comes to keeping this blog up to date with what's been going on in the Pearl family, I'm currently falling way behind--which is par for the course these days (months, years, what-have-you). Some people are just so good at writing regularly, and so fun to follow (Colleen and Madeline, you two blogging champs come immediately to mind!), but others of us seem to suffer from a constant state of blogger's block.  In my case, it happens because there's too much happening, too quickly, and so much I want to write about that I don't know where to start. Kind of like when you have an extremely messy house and can't figure out which room needs cleaning the most.

I have too much that I want to say.  And so I choose to say nothing a lot of the time.

Excuses, excuses--right?

I never even got around to blogging about our road trip to Iowa a week after Easter, to visit with our much-missed oldest son and his family (who lived nearby here in VA for four-and-a-half years, then moved away a little over a year ago--and boy, do we ever miss them!!). We hadn't seen them since November 2022, so too much time had passed! We were able to be there for the First Holy Communion of our firstborn's #4 daughter, City Girl. It was so beautiful, taking place during a traditional Latin High Mass at their parish.  She wore one of the two dresses I made back in 2019 for her oldest (identical twin) sisters. 

These dresses have now become part of this family's tradition.  I made one with a lace Peter Pan collar and the other with a plain neck and an extra band of lace embellishment at the waist; I wanted them to be slightly different so the twins could choose the individual style they liked best.  Sister Little Gal wore the one with the collar for her First Holy Communion in 2021.  And City Girl picked the one without the collar.  So each dress has now been worn twice.  

I dream of these dresses, made with lots more love than skill, being worn years from now by great-granddaughters whom I may never meet (although I hope to!).  I dream that they become my favorite sort of thing: family heirlooms.

Anyway--

Aside from celebrating this beautiful sacrament, we were able to become friends with our one-year-old granddaughter, who really doesn't know us very well, now that we only get to visit with her family a couple of times a year.  (Did I give her a blog name yet?  I can't remember.  If not, I think I shall call her Little Lady.)  She has big blue eyes ("lollipop eyes," as one of her aunts described them) and is just about the most adorable little person imaginable. But she spent most of the week we were there studying her Papa and me with suspicion from a safe distance, head down, raising her eyes to peer at us.  She warmed up to Grammy first, allowing me to hold her as long as one of "her people" was close-by.  Papa finally became her best buddy when we had to babysit for her and her four-year-old brother towards the end of our stay, because the rest of the family was going to her twin sisters' play.  The two oldest girls had parts in the chorus of the musical "State Fair," which was put on by their homeschooling group.  My husband and I went to see the opening night show on Friday, then we stayed back to watch the two youngest siblings while everyone else went to the Saturday matinee--and that bonding time with those little ones was truly a gift.

These girls, at not quite 12, kind of tower over me now, so they must be slouching
in this picture.  (I've been slowing shrinking while they've been quickly growing!)

"State Fair" is just wonderful, with songs by Rogers & Hammerstein.  And it is especially fun because the story is set in Iowa.

It was hard to say goodbye when we left; but we were fortunate to have the opportunity to drive our son to the airport about five hours from his house, as it was on our route back home anyway; this saved him a commute to work by plane and gave us that precious extra time in the car to chat with him.  (We did solve all of the world's problems on that drive, and even had some good laughs as well.)

Aside from the goings-on out in the Midwest, there's also been a recent Baptism, of Pearl grandchild #20; but unfortunately we were unable to travel to Nashville to attend it.  Our daughter-in-law's parents were able to be there, however, which is special because this is their first grandchild.  I've yet to see pictures of that sweet little girl, the youngest of our grandchildren (for now, anyway!), receiving her first sacrament.  But I've been assured that they're coming!  

Let's see, what else?  How about some recent VA news? 

Last Sunday we had son #4 and his family over for an after-Mass brunch.  He and his wife are the parents of triplets, identical twin boys and a girl, aged 5, and a 3-year-old girl.  Those kiddos love to come and play in our basement playroom (I've got a post in my drafts folder with my deep musings about playrooms, actually; maybe it's time to edit it and get it posted!  I bet you're thinking, "That sounds fascinating!”). That same night, we had Sunday dinner over at son #2's house.  He and his wife Ginger have four boys, aged 2 to 7, and another baby on the way, due in mid-June. Ginger is a great cook, so we enjoyed a delicious meal of Pioneer Woman steak bites, rice, salad, and homemade brownies with ice cream.  We stayed way too late talking, which we have a tendency to do when it comes to our kids.  (Isn't life grand when you not only love, but sincerely like, your kids?!)

Yesterday, son #3 had a birthday, and we were able to celebrate it with him by bringing over one of his favorite meals and his favorite cinnamon coffee cake for dessert.  I'm a broken record, so I'll add that we stayed way too late talking with him and his Preciosa after the kids were in bed.   It's so worth it, though, even though it means we don't get home and in bed until midnight or after.  We'll sleep when we're dead!

I don't know what's gotten into me today.  I'm feeling a little silly.

Anyway, I'd have to say that 37 is looking pretty good on this middle son of ours.  He is surrounded by lots of noise and activity with his energetic brood, and surrounded even more by lots of love.

God is so good.  Life is so full, I can't even imagine having time to get bored.  And VA is so ridiculously mild and lovely in the spring.  Everything is blooming and I am in Heaven, as much as one can be in this earthly life.  

Father Mike always says, at the end of each episode of his Catechism in a Year podcast, "I'm praying for you.  Please pray for me!" Ditto that, dear readers.

Okay then, until next time...which will hopefully be pretty soon! 

Cows, and Chickens, and Goats—Oh My!

In this recent post, I promised some photos of my oldest son and his wife Regina's sweet Iowa homestead. Their livestock includes three cows, three goats, three cats, 16 ducks, 17 chickens, and two rabbits. And they're gardening and growing their own vegetables.  While we were visiting them last week, we ate roasted potatoes that had come from their garden and a chicken dish made with one of the chickens they'd slaughtered and frozen.  I feel a bit as if I've gone back in time or something—back to a simpler era when most families lived this way; and although I'm not sure I was made for this rural life myself (I’m not a big city girl, but I’m definitely a small town girl), I admire what our kids are doing.

Here are some snapshots I took around their "farm."

And since it’s almost Christmas, here’s the new hay manger our son just got for feeding his cows this winter.  A bit big to be a bed for the Baby Jesus...but a manger nonetheless!

Wishing you all a blessed Advent, dear readers.  

Feeling Both Grief and Joy

What a crazy development: my 11-year-old twin granddaughters are both taller than I am!  The older of the twins (by about three minutes) is 5'8" now, taller than I've ever been.

I am protecting her privacy; but I'm also protecting
you from seeing my just-woke-up face.  Yikes! 
You're welcome!

The younger twin is 5'6" and change, which is just about the height I was before I began to shrink. I'm at least an inch shorter than I used to be. AAAGGGHHH!  How did this happen?  And by "this," I mean two things: how did these granddaughters get old enough to be taller than I am, and how did I get old enough to shrink?

It's hard to accept that these two sweet girls who made me a grandmother for the first time in 2011 are turning into young women.  Where have the years gone?!  Soon, their American Girl dolls will be discarded and replaced by more grown-up interests.  It's sad, but also just exactly the way it should be.

Being out here with them and their siblings this week has been so special, but our time together has passed very quickly.  Yesterday morning at breakfast, the twins' 9-year-old sister wondered why we just couldn't stay until Christmas.  

Well...that is not an option, dear one.  If we could be two places at once, we surely would! But we have a home and a life to go back to in VA, with people there who also depend on us and like to know we're close, people whom we love as intensely as we do those who live out here in Iowa.  So today we'll be on the road again; but I'm sad that the days have flown by this week, just as the years have flown.  In a perfect world, we could all--every single Pearl on our long and ever-growing string--live near one another and never have to miss each other so much in between visits.  Alas, however, this just cannot be.

One of my favorite Catholic writer/blogger/IG influencers, Elizabeth Foss, recently wrote on IG*: "You can be grateful and sad at the same time.  You can count your blessings and be all too well aware of the cost. You can be hurt and smile anyway.  You can feel both grief and joy.  You can notice the light in the darkness."

Yes, that's exactly it!  Foss hits the nail on the head, as usual.

Later on this morning when we leave, I'll feel lots of grief, I'm sure.  But I'll also feel joy, because I believe that this oldest son of ours, his wife, and his six children are living the life they were meant to live, even though to do so, they have to be far away from us. 

Of course I would love it if this beloved family moved back to VA and lived less than 20 minutes from our front door, as they did for four-plus years before they made their move out to the Midwest almost a year ago.  But with a life as blessed as mine has been, I'm afraid it would be selfish to want too much.  Just knowing that they are all thriving here--living out their homesteading dream, finding a like-minded Catholic homeschooling community and making good friends--is enough. The close relationship we have always enjoyed with these precious grandchildren and their parents has not been affected one iota by their move; the distance between us is only in miles, not in love. 

But it's true, as Foss says, that in this valley of tears we live in before we go to our eternal home, even when there are blessings those often come at a cost.  A mother's heart must bear the pain of many swords--but if she's lucky, small ones, non-lethal ones--over the course of a lifetime. There is rarely joy without a bit of grief mixed in.  So hold your babies tight, young mamas.  The days are long sometimes, but the years are rather shockingly short.

*I'm not on IG anymore (of all the social media sites I gave up, that is the only one I still miss); but did you know that you can jump on there and read a post or two before you get kicked off and asked to sign in?  So I cheat and check up on Elizabeth Foss (and a couple of others) from time to time.

Resurrecting the Blog: From Iowa, with Love

Well,  just when I'd begun to think that it seriously might be time to close up shop here (I mean, it's been over TWO MONTHS since I posted anything new!), something rather extraordinary happened that made me wonder if perhaps I should stick around and keep on blogging.  For a little while longer, anyway.  (More about that in a minute.)

This past Saturday, two days after Thanksgiving, my husband and I started a two-day trek out to visit our oldest son and his family in Iowa.  We had just seen the families of our three VA boys (sons # 2, 3, and 4) over Thanksgiving, and we will be seeing them again for Christmas, along with our youngest son and his pregnant wife who will be coming from Nashville.  But we knew that we were not going to be able to spend any of the holidays with our firstborn's gang; so we decided to squeeze in a trip to Iowa before the Christmas season starts getting too busy.

We drove about 10 hours on Saturday and stopped in South Bend, IN, where we stayed with one of my husband's younger sisters and her husband and caught the Notre Dame-USC game (on TV).  We were joined by another younger brother of my husband's, along with a few nieces and nephews who go to school out there.

My sweet sister-in-law is the hostess with the mostest and I just love her.

On Sunday we went to an early Mass at the crypt at Sacred Heart Basilica on the Notre Dame campus, visited for a few more hours with our Pearl relatives, and then set out to finish up the last five hours of our road trip.  Our son had told us that his family was planning to go to a barn dance that day, where lots of Catholic families from his area in Iowa and even some from farther away (from Illinois and Wisconsin) were gathering at the farm of a large homeschooling Catholic family.  The location for this barn dance was actually between South Bend and our son's house, maybe an hour from where he lives--we would have had to pass it anyway on our way to our final destination.  So we decided to plan to meet them at the barn dance; we told him and his wife not to tell the kids we were coming, so it could be a surprise.  We thought it would be so much fun to show up and when they saw us say, "Oh wow!  We just wanted to come to this barn dance; we didn't know you were going to be here, too!"

It really was a hoot to walk up the hill that led to the barn and see our granddaughter (one of the 11-year-old twins) look in our direction, then look at her father as if to say, "What is going on?!"--and then look at us again and realize that her mind wasn't playing tricks on her, it really was us!  We hadn't seen this sweet family since they came to visit in VA in September, and it was a joyful reunion, to put it mildly.

An awesome sign on the fence outside the barn.

This barn dance was something else, I'll tell you.  There must have been a couple hundred people there--lots of big families with kids of all ages, from teens down to newborns.  Sweet, modestly dressed, well-behaved children all.  It was a joy to watch them on the dance floor--big ones holding the hands of little ones, without any thought about looking "cool."  There was an impressive pot luck meal and a man who was directing the dancers, showing them all the steps, acting as DJ for the music. Our granddaughters were particularly excited to do the Virginia Reel, which they'd learned at the last barn dance they'd attended at this place.  (Apparently these amazing hosts have them four times a year!)

My husband left the barn to go into the house just before we were about to leave (I was still in the barn, talking to my grandkids while they gathered up their coats and got ready to go), and he saw the wife/mother of the family who owned the farm, so he stopped to thank her.  She was talking to another woman, so he introduced himself to her.  This woman told my husband that she recognized his wife.  He thought she must be talking about our daughter-in-law, because how in the world would she know me?  But then she said, "You have lots of sons, don't you?"  He told her that we did, but again, he was baffled.  How did she know this about him, and how did she know me?  Then she told him that she recognized me from the picture on my blog.  Apparently, this woman used to read it and recognized me, and she remembered that we had a number of sons.

My husband brought this nice woman from Illinois into the barn to meet me, and she actually gave me a hug as if we were old friends.  We talked for a bit (not about the blog, but about how wonderful it was that these Catholic homeschooling families are creating this beautiful parallel community of like-minded people, even traveling long distances to get together, and things along that line).  After a few minutes she hugged me again before she left.  

Wait, I did ask her one blog-related question.  I asked how in the world she ever found this little site of mine.  She couldn't remember how she'd stumbled upon it, and it had been a number of years since she'd read it.  But it touched me beyond belief that she'd once been a reader, and that she'd come to know my boys a little (they are so worth knowing, according to their not-at-all biased mommy!).  Meeting this very kind woman, a mom much younger than I, reminded me again that aside from being an online scrapbook of family memories for me, this blog might have something to offer readers I will most likely never meet.  I felt extraordinarily blessed to have met this one. 

Anyway--

I think maybe I'm back.  I'm a bit overwhelmed by how much I should have written about the past couple of months but didn't.  There are SO MANY birthdays in the Pearl family in October and November, and I never blogged once during those months.  Perhaps I'll do a little family news recap before all else is eclipsed by Christmas goings-on.

If you're here, you're probably related to me by blood or marriage, and you know I love you!  If you're not related to me and you read this blog anyway, God bless you and thanks so much for stopping by.

This post has gone on long enough, so I'll end here.  But in the next few days, I'm going to have to do a photo dump to show you our oldest son's amazing little farm (it's more of a homestead, I guess, but WOW).  I'll leave you with just one picture, until next time.

Postcards from Iowa

We have been staying at our oldest son's house in Iowa this past week.  His darling family moved away from us, after being our VA neighbors for more than four years, just after the New Year.  [Cue heartbreaking sobs.]  We hadn’t seen them since we drove out in February, shortly after the birth of their new baby girl.

It’s been wonderful to be here, to see them creating this new life out here: making their homesteading dreams come true on their bucolic four-plus acre lot, complete with a beautiful old farmhouse, huge outbuildings, garden plots, and plenty of grassy pasture areas for the cows they plan to own soon.  We were here for the delivery of their 50 chicks, but we leave in two days so unfortunately we will be gone before the cows come home.  (See what I did there?)

Our son and his Regina plan to grow and raise as much of their own food as they can, and to continue homeschooling their brood--which with the new baby includes five daughters and one son.  We like their survival odds if the dire predictions for the world's future come to pass.

Our boy’s four oldest girls (who are also our four oldest granddaughters) are all voracious readers, doll and animal lovers, and quite talented with a needle and embroidery thread. They seem perfectly suited to an old-fashioned, sweet and simple, Little House on the Prairie sort of life. They’ve got acres of soft green grass to run on and plenty of trees that are perfect for climbing. They will certainly bloom where they’ve been planted.  (As will their brother, who idolizes and terrorizes them in equal measure!).

Anyhoo—

These pictures I’ve snapped this week look like postcards to me.  So hello from Iowa!

February Made Me Shiver

I was AWOL throughout the month of February.  So I thought I'd do a quick re-cap of the Pearl family goings-on during that extended hiatus from the blog.

In early February, our granddaughter Princesa (oldest daughter of son #3) turned six.  And her Papa and I decided that as a special birthday treat, we would take her out to dinner and then shopping at Target afterward.  We went to a fun brew pub-type restaurant, arriving early enough to beat the dinner crowd, and we had the most wonderful time.  

This restaurant had mac and cheese on the kids' menu; and better yet, they included an image
of the Kraft box right there on the menu to ensure your kids would love it.  (Ours did.)

That little girl was absolutely adorable throughout our "date night" together.  Her mom had warned us that she would be thrilled, but would probably be a bit shy on her own and not say a whole lot.  Nothing could have been further from the truth!  She was so animated and chatty all night.  It made us realize that this is something we need to start doing with all of our grandchildren when they get old enough to behave for it/appreciate it.  With 18 of them now, and another on the way any day, it's getting harder and harder to get good quality one-on-one time with each precious child.  When the whole gang is at our house for a family party, it's utter chaos (in the best way of course; but still...chaos).

Our second-born son also had an early February birthday, and we were able to celebrate it by having dinner with him at his house, with his wife and four young sons.  (I brought the cake!)

I LOVE the way Junior, his oldest son, is looking at my boy here!

I told you not too long ago that our oldest son and his family were moving away to Iowa, after living a stone's throw from us in VA for more than four years.  About a week-and-a-half into February, we drove out there to see their new digs and offer whatever help we could after the birth of their new baby girl, who'd been born two weeks ahead of schedule in late January.  This sweet little peanut has four older sisters, aged 10, 10, 8, and 6, and a 3-and-a-half-year-old brother.

My boy and his girl.  Is this not the sweetest?!

It was so wonderful to see all of them, of course, but also to see their new house and their new town, so that when I think of them I can picture them in their new surroundings. When we got there, the baby was still struggling to gain weight, but by the time we left two weeks later, she was doing great.  Her little cheeks had gotten visibly rounder during our stay.  And what a little angel she is!

One thing I did find out during those two weeks in February: five years of living in VA has made me SOFT!  Not that I ever liked being cold; but I did, after all, grow up in Upstate NY and raise my boys in NH, so I had to be tough.  I've survived many a brutal Nor'easter.   I am no stranger to snow and ice and below-freezing temperatures.  But yikes!  It was cold out there in Iowa!  Windy and cold.  BRRRR!

There was one mild day, however, and we took advantage of it by going for a walk with the five older kids along the country road on which they live.

Those fields will soon be full of corn!

It was sweet to see how much the older girls doted on their baby sister.  She has a lot of loving mothers dying to hold her, that's for sure.

Beautiful!

We returned from Iowa on Saturday, Feb. 26.  And remember that chaos I alluded to earlier in this post?  Well, on Sunday, Feb. 27 we hosted a little Mardi Gras party for our VA gang: sons #2, #3, and #4, their wives, and their 12 kids aged 7 and under.  (We would have waited until the official "Fat Tuesday" on March 1, the night before the start of Lent; but it's hard to get everyone together on school/work nights.)  I bought all the paper goods and party favors well ahead of time, and I made a lasagna and a King Cake before we left for Iowa and put them in the freezer.  Each family contributed side dishes to the meal, so I had minimal work to do for the party when we got back home. We didn't have much time to rest up from our travels before the festivities, but I was anxious to see everyone as soon as possible after being away for so long.  

Even though my husband and I had never hosted a Mardi Gras party the whole time we were raising our family, we have now had three of them down here in VA.  So it appears that it's becoming a bit of a tradition for us with the grandchildren!

I guess that about wraps it up.  We've been busy since we got back from Iowa.  We go to daily Mass.  We've been having our twice-weekly playdates with son #4's wife and four kids (Braveheart makes the 35-minute drive on Tuesdays and Thursdays so the triplets can attend a Catholic pre-school in our town).

We've done a bit of babysitting here and there, and a bit of visiting.  One night last week, son #2 (who lives about 50 minutes north of us) and sons #3 and #4 (who live about 35 minutes south) met up to see the new Batman movie at the little theater in our town.  And afterward, they came by our house to say hi and grab coffees-to-go.  I cannot tell you what a joy it is for their dad and me just to have them around, to hear them talking and laughing.  We don't even care if we're part of their conversation; just having them hanging out together under our roof and listening to the sound of their voices makes us so happy.  (No matter how old they get, they will always be my boys!  Always.)

I miss our two boys from whom we are separated, geographically--so much that it often brings me to tears.  However, I know just how lucky a mom and grandmother I am.  It's such a blessing to have so many of our family members living nearby.  Our kids are our best friends, truly; but there's been a surprising  development in recent months: we've gotten to be good friends with a couple we met at church--a couple who moved here about a year ago and whose reasons for relocating are very much like ours.  It took almost five years of adjusting to our "new" life in VA, but we are beginning to make connections, and we have our wonderful little parish to thank for that!  But more on that later.

Until next time...