As for that first R, reading novels:
I have always thought that the greatest of guilty pleasures was having the free time to dive into a well-written, engrossing novel, preferably a long one, with lots of historical content (WWII is an especially intriguing era for me) or with several generations of interweaving family relationships--and with as few gratuitous scenes involving sexual situations described in embarrassing detail as possible. (None of those is the best amount, actually. They have never yet added to any book I've read!) Some mystery is also welcome, but nothing too scary or dark. I don't need a happy ending, although I do admit I like them.
When I found this novel recently and chose it as the first pick on my summer reading list, I thought I was going to adore it.
Three generations of women who wore the same wedding dress [swoon]! And the title, The Grace Kelly Dress--if you know me at all, you know that I kind of have a thing about Grace Kelly. I even named the title character in my first novel, Finding Grace, after her. And the eye-catching cover! [Insert heart-eyed emoji here.]
But half-way into it, I was like, "Meh..."
When our oldest son and his family were visiting us recently, I was telling his wife (a fellow bookworm who was a librarian before she became a homeschooling mom of 5) that given the title, I was surprised that I wasn't enjoying it more.
My boy, without missing a beat, deadpanned, "That's the title...and you're surprised that it isn't very good?" Then he gave me one of his charmingly crooked grins and I pretended to scold him for his impertinence, and we chuckled about it.
Obviously, there aren't many guys who would be drawn to a book about a dress.
Which brings me to the second R, raising boys:
I cannot tell you what a pure delight it was to have been the only female in our family of seven, totally outnumbered, the whole time our sons were growing up in our house. I've often said that men are simple creatures, but when I say that, it is not meant to be the least bit derogatory. In fact, it is my humble opinion that we females could learn a lot from them. Their needs are clearly articulated and easy to satisfy, and they don't have a lot of undercurrents in their emotions. They don't waste time looking for problems where none exist. At least mine didn't. Generally speaking, men seem to express their anger and/or frustration easily and then move on fairly quickly. It makes for a pretty peaceful existence, or at least that was my experience. People used to say, "Only boys? God bless you, you poor thing!" Or they'd ask if we were going to "try for our girl." But I can honestly say that God gave me exactly the family I was supposed to have, and I never felt like I was missing out on something better.
But we didn't read the same novels, my boys and I--unless it was something they were required to read for AP English in high school. And then, to my joy, I got to hear one of them say he didn't hate Pride and Prejudice--and even (and I quote), "Mr. Bennett is really funny." He didn't go so far as to become a diehard Austen fan, but I'll take it.
So if you're a mom of all boys, take heart; feed them and cheer for them and just love them, and someday, you might get to experience the exquisite joy of watching them in the role of loving fathers to your precious grandbabies.
|Son #1, currently a father of 5.|
|Son #2, father of 3 with one on the way.|
|Son #3, father of 4.|
|Son #4, father of 4 (including almost-3-year-old triplets).|
"God bless you," they liked to say to me? Indeed, he already has! (And I just want to add that son #5 has been married less than a year and isn't a daddy yet, so that's the reason he wasn't included here. He has always followed proudly in the footsteps of his older brothers, though, so I have no doubt that he will be an amazing father as well.)
Finally, I come to the third R, praying Rosaries:
I'm quite sure that our family's countless blessings can be attributed to the intercession of Our Blessed Mother and Her most powerful prayer.
Back in 1995, when our youngest son was two, we began saying a daily family Rosary with our boys. (They even dubbed our living room the "Rosary Room," because that's where we would gather to say it.) For a year or so before we started doing this, we had two sons very close in age who were going through a fighting phase (mostly arguments, but sometimes ending in a shove or a punch) that made their poor mom wonder if they would ever be friends. They were like oil and water and knew just how to push each other's buttons. So when we instituted the family Rosary and would list our intentions before beginning to pray, my husband would first say, "For peace and harmony in our household." (We also put photos of those two boys underneath our statue of Our Lady of Grace, prayerfully hoping that She could work to make them get along better.) I kid you not, within three weeks' time, my husband and I both noticed that the squabbles had stopped. They. Just. Stopped. Now I'm not saying that there was never any bickering or disagreement amongst our children from that point on, but the two who had been at each other for far too long were suddenly friends again.
The power of the Rosary. Don't doubt it.
Once our boys got into high school and their schedules were crammed with sports practices and games, daily hours of homework, etc., it became harder to get everyone gathered together at the same time. But my husband and I continued the practice even when they couldn't join us. The beautiful thing is that now, some of our boys and their wives have begun reciting family Rosaries, or decades of the Rosary, with their own young children.
This summer, my husband and I plan to say lots of our daily Rosaries while anchored out on the lake in our boat. That's what we did last night, and it was like a little slice of Heaven.
Oh Mary conceived without sin, pray for us who have recourse to Thee!
(And P.S.--I think I will try to finish The Grace Kelly Dress, and I'll let you know if it gets better in the second half!)