Sunday, November 3, 2013

3 Reasons I Love Catholicism: Marriage, Marriage, Marriage!

(And 3 Reasons I Love, Too)
I haven't joined Micaela for this link-up in a while.  But due to some recent happy developments in our family, I wanted to join in today to share one reason--one out of so, so many reasons--that I love my Faith.  And while I'm at it, I'll show you 3 young Catholic couples who most definitely love their Faith, too.

One of my favorite things about the Catholic Faith is the importance it puts on marriage.  The Catechism teaches that "The matrimonial covenant, by which a man and a woman establish themselves a partnership of the whole life, is by its nature ordered toward the good of the spouses and the procreation and education of offspring; this covenant between baptized persons has been raised by Christ the Lord to the dignity of a sacrament."  It also says that "On the threshold of his public life Jesus performs his first sign--at his mother's request--during a wedding feast.  The Church attaches great importance to Jesus' presence at the wedding at Cana.  She sees in it the confirmation of the goodness of marriage and the proclamation that thenceforth marriage will be an efficacious sign of Christ's presence."  It was obviously not an accident that Christ's first public miracle was performed at a wedding feast.

My husband and I feel very blessed.  Our boys grew up so grounded in their Catholic Faith that it was their goal to find wives who shared that Faith and would insist on passing it on to their children.  None of them, at least so far, has felt the call to the priesthood, which would have been wonderful if that was God's will for them; but each feels called to Christian marriage and fatherhood, and in this crazy world of ours, where traditional families seem to be (sadly) disappearing, this is indeed a vital and noble vocation.

The best place to meet a future wife, of course, is probably during one's student years.  My husband and I met in high school (which I realize rarely leads to lifelong commitment, but luckily for us it did).  A couple of my husband's brothers met their wives while they were undergrads at Notre Dame and the gals were students at its sister school, St. Mary's.  If ever there was an available pool of lovely and intelligent Catholic young ladies to meet, it was out in South Bend, where all of our sons spent part of their lives (and where the youngest is currently in his junior year).  But for whatever reason, God did not put our older boys' soul mates in their paths out there; He had other plans for them.  (The jury is still out on son #5, however.  Wink, wink.)

Once they got out into the working world, it became a lot more difficult for our boys to meet available and suitable young women.  Their workplaces weren't exactly filled with them, and they weren't all that interested in meeting them in bars.  (I do know of several successful marriages that are the fruits of such meetings, so I'm not here to judge!)

Our oldest son, who was stationed down South in the Army and not having any luck meeting the kind of girl he was looking for, decided to try when he was 24.  When we first heard about that, we were a little unsettled.  On-line dating?!  It seemed like a strange way to meet someone, and not all that safe either.  But our son told us that before you even start thinking about contacting someone you meet on the site, you can check and see how they answered 7 important questions concerning their adherence to the beliefs of the Catholic Faith.  Each member is asked whether or not he/she accepts the Church's teachings on these 7 matters of Church doctrine:
1. Eucharist
2. Contraception
3. Sanctity of life
4. Papal infallibility
5. Premarital sex
6. Immaculate Conception
7. Holy Orders
My son said that he was looking for a "7 out of 7"--but that many of the Catholics on the site have a problem with two of these items: #2 and #5 (perhaps you would have guessed that those were the problem areas for many young people these days without my telling you).

But in November of 2007, he "met" a sweet Midwesterner, a darling 7 out of 7, and they began talking on-line and then on the phone.  In January of 2008, they made plans to meet in person for the first time in NYC, where she was working for the year.  (They first saw each other when they met by the big clock in Grand Central Station--it's a great story!)  In February, after a second visit with her, our son was already so in love that he hinted he might have to start saving for a ring.  In July of 2008, they were engaged.  That October, he left for a year-long deployment to Iraq, and our daughter-in-law planned the wedding.  He got back in October of 2009 and they were married that December.  They are now the proud parents of three adorable girls under the age of two-and-a-half (including identical twins).  You can read more about them in this article that was published on the website.

Son #4, encouraged by the luck his brother had had, joined, too, and in October of 2011, he "met" a sweet girl (with a similar slightly skewed sense of humor), another 7 out of 7 who was teaching English to schoolchildren in South Korea.  They had an all-Skype relationship and "saw" each other exclusively for about 6 months, talking on-line for 3-4 hours at a pop.   She returned to the States in May of 2012, when they finally met in person for the first time.  Since then, they've only gotten more sure of their future together, and when our son had to go to Afghanistan for a 6-month deployment last April, they had to return to their epic Skype sessions to deal with the separation.  But--huzzah!--last Friday (October 25), shortly after he returned to the States for good, he proposed, and they are planning a 2014 wedding.

Encouraged by the success his brothers were having, our #3 son joined in April of 2012.  When he called to tell me he had news by saying he'd gone on the "family website," for a moment I didn't get what he was talking about.  Oh, right--he'd gone on CatholicMatch!  He'd met someone!  How did I not guess that?  He was luckier than either of his brothers--because the wonderful girl with whom he'd connected lived only two hours away from him, so they were able to meet in person almost immediately.  They hit it off and were dating exclusively from the get-go, and their mutual love of college football cemented their relationship.  Before I could even ask, my son assured me, "Don't worry, Mom.  She's a 7 out of 7."  (By that time, I was an old hand at the whole CatholicMatch thing.)   By Christmas of last year, he told us that he was ring shopping and planning an April engagement.  By April of 2013, they were engaged...and they are getting married in just over a month!  (Can't wait!)  They, too, appeared in an article on the website, if you'd like to check that out.

Once, when we were homeschooling our youngest son (something we hadn't done with the others), our #2 son was asked by a friend if his baby brother was a "little weird."  That's the unfortunate stereotype about homeschooling with some people, I guess; it's probably also the stereotype with some people about on-line dating.  Lest you think my sons or their gals were too socially awkward, unattractive, or strange to meet members of the opposite sex the traditional way, here are 3 pictures that show why I love Catholicism, which is the very thing that brought these beautiful couples together in the first place.

Son #1 and his wife, married December 2009.

Son #3 and his fiancée, getting married December 2013.

Son #4 and his fiancée, newly engaged and planning a 2014 wedding.
Don't you think these 3 happy, good-looking couples would make a great advertisement for  (I agree.)

For more reasons why Catholicism is just the greatest, head on over to Micaela's blog.  You're sure to find lots and lots of good reasons (some you've thought of yourself, and some that will make you exclaim, "Yes--and I never thought of that one!").  It will fill your heart with warmth and hope!


  1. Beautiful blog and BEAUTIFUL pictures!

    1. They sure are a fine-lookin' group of youngsters (said their proud mommy/mommy-in-law).


  2. Oh my goodness, Laura! Three beautiful and heartwarming stories. I am really glad CatholicMatch is out there. In case any of my younger siblings need it of course. I certainly don't!

    And I too am so so grateful for the value Catholicisim places on marriage. I know I've received an abundance of graces through our matrimony.

    Now I wonder where your future daughter in law was in South Korea! So curious! :)

    1. Micaela, I'll find out and get back to you. I know she did a lot of traveling around Asia during the last month or so of their on-line courtship, before she headed back home (she went to Thailand, but I can't remember where else). But I'll find out where she was living when she was teaching in Korea.

    2. Okay, she was about a half hour south of Seoul, in the small city of Chungju. Do you know it?

  3. These are all great! Funny story... My Mom once signed me up for because I wanted to take the temperament test that they had there. Since I was far too young to consider even real-life dating, my Mom clicked at random and I ended up appearing to be some African American woman in her 60s who had 3 piercings and 5 tattoos...or something like that. It was hilarious!

    If I may ask on the blog, which Church is your son getting married at in December and who is celebrating it? My family is so involved in the diocese, I might know the place/priest personally.

  4. They're getting married at St. Thomas Aquinas, on the UVA campus--I think by the pastor there. My soon-to-be-daughter-in-law is also having a priest friend be involved, but I don't think he's going to concelebrate. (I think he's going to be an altar server?)

    Do you know the priest at UVA?

  5. Mom,
    Katie priest friend, Tim Holeda, is concelebrating. He is going to the courthouse in VA when he flies in to get the certification. He is concelebrating with Fr. Stephen Alcott. Another one of Katie's friends is a deacon before becomming a priest. His name is Mark Kowalski, and he is altar serving.

  6. How funny that they all found their spouses on CatholicMatch! If only my younger brother were still Catholic, I'm sure he could find someone there...

    1. I still can't believe we have three CatholicMatch matches in this family. :)

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